Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Today was a half day.
His (gay's) parents called my commander at 6am, called my mate at midnight. Apparently he's been having a very disturbed span of time these 2 days.
He's not ok on sunday night after we book in because he approach his dream love and created trouble for himself.
He looks ok when he book out after monday noon.
He's not ok after he went home.
That's what we see for this 2 days. Thats how unpredictable his behavior is becoming. So far, he's committed 3 serious military offences:
1. Being gay and not declaring when signing on.
2. Attempting to commit suicide.
3. Lying to senior officers.
Yet, he managed to escape being handcuffed. I seriously think its something he should be stress about. But he didn't.
He's stress about his dream love not accepting him. He's stress over not being able to cope with his work. He's stress over feeling he's outcasted by the rest of us.
These few days, he put on his newly bought headphone just to listen to 2 songs that makes him feels sad and let him reminds himself of his dream love. This is what he said himself.
He made up stories to his psychaistrist, and he didn't mentioned about himself being a gay. He changed words to," idol", "his admirer". Yet he declared that he's fallen for this guy to us. This also reminds him about the guy he "admired" back in poly and left him because he told that guy he likes him. He can't put the past back.
So all this accumulated inside his mind until now. And now he can't handle them each at a time. So he loses control of himself today, he turned mental.
Seriously, its a mental behaviour.. hiding at a corner of the room, staring into blank spaces.. hands over head..standing and mumbling something nobody could understand.
Yet, he looks normal again after we reached his house to speak with his parents. Believing his parents can't take the fact their son's a gay, we just discussed about his relationship with us, with his work and his personalities and attitudes.
My commander understands everything's still not gonna be okay, so do we.
Chongz stepped on your garbage at
Thrown Away
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